Friday, July 29, 2016

For Good. . .

On Monday, (first day at my new school) I'm walking back from lunch and a wifi run and this young man who is working stops me and says "What is your last name?" I told him - he said, "didn't you used to work at Inwood or Westwood - one of those 'wood schools?" I said yes, that I worked at Westwood. Yesterday, he passed me while I'm walking with my sister and says "Hi Ms.Jimmerson." My sister just rolls her eyes and says "Really? You know him?" (It always amazes her when my former students show up far away from Westwood. In Winter Haven, it makes sense, but not in Davenport.)
Today, I'm digging around in my storage space looking for some office supplies and a young man comes around the corner looking for one of the carts they supply to move stuff. I tell him he can have the one I'm using because at the moment, I'm not really using it. He comes to get it and says "I can't remember when or where but you were my teacher." We went over the time and place, he was so, so nice. (As a plus, he told me I don't look any different now than then so SCORE!)
I've been sorting, cleaning, digging through a lot of my teacher stuff this summer. I keep finding things that I inherited when my friend retired. Ii have borders and a dolly from Mrs. Smith, lots of books and other good stuff from my friends Mrs. Grant and Mrs. Turner. I find books that I used with Mrs. Barry, when we taught the same subject, things that I shared with lots of other teachers.
Looking through and packing up my library stuff, I find things that my friend Mrs. Sharon found to make my media center pretty. I found beautiful letters that my friend Mrs. Kathy decorated, my wooden letters that my sweet church babies decorated for me. I see lists and things that I made to organize that huge media center space at Westwood and I remember all the people who came and helped me move and rearrange and clean.
     
     I keep finding things, but those things remind me that the most  important things are not THINGS.  Mostly, I'm amazed by the time and energy that other people have poured into my life.   When I think of my 22 years at Westwood, this sums it up:
So, let me say before we part:
So much of me
Is made of what I learned from you.
You'll be with me
Like a handprint on my heart.
And now whatever way our stories end
I know you have rewritten mine


If I could write or sing a song about how I feel, this would be it:


Sunday, July 24, 2016

Tomorrow A New Adventure Begins. . .

Two years ago, I started a new chapter in my life when I moved from my classroom to the media center. In some ways, my life didn’t change that much, in some ways it changed drastically. Tomorrow, it’s not just a new chapter, it’s a brand new book – a new story, if you will.

I’ve started school at Westwood Middle School for 22 years. For 22 years, I’ve had nervous dreams the night before school started. School doesn’t start tomorrow, but I’m going back to work tomorrow. But, for the first time in 22 years, I’m not going to Westwood Middle. I don’t have any school keys for the first time in years. I’ve been working on stuff all summer, and emptying my old media center, speaking to book vendors, processing new books for my new media center. Tomorrow it’s all different.

Tomorrow, I step foot into a brand new media center that no one has ever had before. Any and all book placements are me. Any book processing specifications are me. If it looks a mess, it’s me. If it doesn’t flow properly and transition nicely, it’s me. It’s exciting.

I’m terrified. Absolutely, positively terrified.

I don’t know one single soul. I have no best buddies waiting for me. I’ve emailed my new secretary, but I have no idea what she even looks like. I’ve met my principal and assistant principals, but only in an interview. I’m afraid I’m going to mess up. I’m afraid my new principal is going to change her mind and think “Why on earth did I choose this person? What was I thinking?” I’m afraid I’m going to do things that don’t make sense. I’m afraid I don’t know enough. I’m afraid I’m not good enough. I’m afraid I’m not enough.

But, then I keep thinking about the strange way this whole job thing worked out. I wasn’t even looking for a new job. I didn’t sweat much in my interview because I was content where I was. I really thought that God was just going to use this interview to confirm that I was where I was supposed to be! But apparently, He had other plans for me – and I can only trust that this is the right thing.

So, I may shelve books wrong – and I may end up moving books around in October. If it doesn’t flow nicely, I’ll rearrange. My books may not end up processed all the same, but they’ll all be similar. I may have chaos and confusion for a few days (or weeks!). I may not know enough. But I’m enough, because I firmly believe that I’m right where I’m supposed to be. So tomorrow, when I step foot in that brand new media center, I won’t be alone. I’ll be OK. There are WAY too many people who love me and who have prayed for me and have poured into me for me to completely screw this up!